this is trite and expected. but for some reason, for a second when i was looking at the minimized version, i read goal as goat and was amused for a moment. by this point it’s boring to just say what you’re expected to say, even if it’s healing. if you say something too many times it’ll lose its meaning and become just a sound, or a string a sounds, said for the sake of hearing itself replicated.
as much as i try to pretend, as i sometimes do, that i don’t have emotions, or don’t feel them too strongly, so as not to be shaken by things too much, i find i’m not the type of person who can not feel things, even if the thing i feel is empty or sad. i feel too strongly sometimes, or the emotion of a moment gets mixed with other things that i’m subconsciously feeling/thinking about but not completely aware of. i should have known that i can’t be emotionless, since i’m so easy to read. and i should be grateful that i feel things, and can shift from emotion to emotion. maybe i should try to not let my head rule everything and just see how things develop naturally. don’t think, don’t react, just be.